Most leadership teams obsess over avoiding failure: missed targets, market shocks, operational mistakes. Those risks are real, but they’re also visible and measurable.
The bigger risk sits under the surface: disconnection.
Disconnection is what happens when people stop feeling safe, seen, or heard at work. They do the job, but their brain and heart are somewhere else. And the cost of that disconnection is staggering emotionally, culturally, and financially.
In my Connected Leadership work, I use a simple three-stage model called The Cost Curve of Control:
Connection Zone: Safety + Stretch
Leaders invite input, share ownership, and create space for mistakes.
Trust compounds.
Performance accelerates.
People feel safe to take smart risks.
Control Zone: Avoid Failure at All Costs
Leaders tighten their grip. They manage risk, watch metrics, and try to contain emotion.
Compliance replaces curiosity.
Innovation slows.
People play it safe instead of stretching.
Disconnection Zone: Protection Over Performance
Trust has fractured. People focus on self-protection instead of the mission.
Engagement drops.
Turnover rises.
Culture quietly collapses.
Most organisations don’t leap from Connection to Disconnection overnight. They drift there, through rushed one-on-ones, avoided truths, and leaders who are always “on” but rarely truly present.
From a neuroscience perspective, disconnection doesn’t just “feel bad”; it changes how the brain works.
Oxytocin (the trust chemical) drops. Collaboration and creativity decline.
The amygdala flips into survival mode. The brain scans for safety, not success.
Social pain activates the same neural pathways as physical pain. The brain codes disconnection as harm.
In this state, people don’t volunteer ideas or raise early warnings. They stay quiet, protect themselves, and avoid taking any risk that might attract negative attention.
Failure can teach the brain.
Disconnection shuts it down.
Research on leadership and engagement backs this up:
Poor leadership costs businesses up to $550 billion annually.
Up to 79% of employees may quit due to lack of management appreciation.
Only 21% of employees globally are engaged at work; low engagement costs the global economy $7.8 trillion.
Gallup estimates that disengagement alone, much of it driven by disconnection and poor leadership, costs organisations around 18% of annual salary expenditure.
This is why I say: Connection costs minutes. Disconnection costs millions.
The Wells Fargo case is a powerful example of disconnection in action. Once a high-integrity, values-driven organisation, it gradually became dominated by control, risk avoidance, and intense sales targets.
Leaders didn’t invite honest input. Psychological safety deteriorated.
Frontline staff moved into survival mode.
To meet impossible metrics in a disconnected environment, thousands of employees felt forced to create fake accounts rather than speak up or fail. Over 5,300 employees were terminated, $185 million in fines were paid, and billions were wiped off the company’s value.
The core issue?
A profound breakdown of connection and trust between leadership and employees.
The culture broke long before the rules did.
So what does Connected Leadership look like in practice?
Research on psychological safety and engaging leadership gives us a clear picture:
Teams with high psychological safety learn faster, share more openly, and achieve higher performance.
Leaders who are inspiring, strengthening, and connecting build teams with higher happiness, lower burnout, and greater adaptability.
These leaders increase trust, resilience, optimism, and participation in decision-making; the building blocks of sustainable performance.
Connected leaders don’t rely on charisma or control.
They build relationship-centred systems where trust, clarity, and purpose are embedded into daily rhythms.
You don’t need a 50-page strategy to repair disconnection. You need consistent, human-centred habits. Here are four you can start this month:
Daily Check-In
Take two minutes to ask, “How are you going?” and listen without rushing to fix.
These micro-moments of care build trust faster than any town hall.
One Non-Work Conversation (Weekly)
Hold one five-minute conversation each week that isn’t about KPIs or deadlines.
It reminds people they’re human beings, not just headcount.
Weekly Recognition (Effort, Not Just Outcomes)
Recognise the effort, learning, and behaviours you want more of, publicly where appropriate.
Recognition reinforces belonging and shared purpose.
Monthly “Review the Room”
Pause and ask:
Who’s quieter than usual?
Who’s withdrawing or opting out of conversations?
Who have I unintentionally lost touch with?
Reconnect early. Silence is rarely just about workload; it’s often about safety.
You will have failures. Every leader does.
The real question is: will your people feel safe enough to learn out loud with you – or will they retreat into silence?
This week, choose one of these actions:
Book three 15-minute check-ins with people who’ve gone quiet.
Start your next team meeting by asking, “What are we not talking about that we really need to?”
Recognise one person publicly for effort, not just outcome.
Tiny shifts in connection change the trajectory of performance.
With strength and kindness,
Justine
